WHO SAID THIS WAS OKAY
NOT OKAY AT ALL
How does this only have 40 notes
What the flying fuck.
“what is this guy doing, is he retarded or something?”
“He’s clearly just spraying a bunch of nonsense.”
“Wait, what? WHAT DID HE JUST DO???”
I still can’t express how much I adore these. I’d love to try it someday.
I wait all year to reblog this
last day to reblog
when you shake laminated paper and it does the thing
I’ve never read a more accurate sound in my life.
Yet another theory of how Dubstep was invented.
i just realized
there are 12 grades of school. Come graduation day i can say it, I can actually freaking say it:
I DID MY WAITING,
12 YEARS OF IT.
IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I am genuinely disappointed I didn’t do this
You are stuck in an ugly building that you’re in against your will for years, and there are creatures in there that suck out our happiness and make you fall into depression or insanity.
Did I just describe Azkaban or high school?
What the fuckery is this?
Umm… Don’t do this to us.
Please check out my audition video for the Electric Forest 2013 Hoop Troupe! If you like it, please share it and spread the love, and wish me luck everyone! ♥
Reasons why you should like Matt Smith
My first powerpoint don’t be too harsh
I must get the thing. - Imgur
AHAHAHAHAHAHA I WONDER HOW MNAY PEOPLE WILL UNDERSTAND THE MOON MOON THING
omg Moon Moon is back.
Moon Moon you’re such a dumb shit.
i reblogged this before but we actually started playing this game and it has resulted in spilled drinks, flying cigarettes, and friends getting hit in the gut with 5lb crystal balls
it is fantastic
this game caused my friend to have to attempt to tie her shoes about four times, failing each time.
This would go over wonderfully(or horribly?) at work
WHY DOES NO ONE DISCUSS CHRIS HARDWICK ON HERE HE IS LITERALLY THE HUMAN EMBODIMENT OF TUMBLR
Oh my Goddddd I love Chris Hardwick!!
So there I was, ready to take a shower. I mean, I was dirty, a little greasy, a shower was not such a horrible idea. People take showers, amiright? Of course!
I get naked.
I’m talking the exact opposite reason why you ever went to your grandmother’s house.
No cookies. Blatant nudity.
That’s how folks take showers these days, right? Well, I pull back the curtain…
And there it was.
This…thing…sitting on the little soap/shower/pube shelf. Not a care in the world, like it’s been there for years. “What the fuck is that?” I think to myself.
Now, what follows is the exact pattern of thought that took me from rational human being to Sloth in 3.4 seconds.
“Is that a Red Lobster cheesy biscuit? Holy fuck that’s a Red Lobster cheesy biscuit. OMG why would someone leave that unattended. Those things are so delicious. I’m gonna eat the fuck out of it. Man, I can’t wait to see whoever left it’s face when they come back to find that someone ate their cheesy biscuit’s fuck. Ohhh boy.”
Then my brain sent a message to my arm that said, “Reach for that cheesy biscuit, bitch. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?”
As you must already know, we are all contractually bound to make a dickload of mistakes throughout our lifetime. Some of those mistakes are so big that they forever hinder our world and warrant entire chapters in our children’s history books. However, most mistakes have the dubious providence of merely haunting one’s soul and festering amidst the subconscious for always and eternity.
This was, nearly, one of those.
If my adjacency to failure could be measured, the only possible unit of measurement to appropriate it would be “baby condoms”. And no, I do not mean those horrendous papoose-like titty-cribs that the slovenly carriage their spawn around in in Wal-Mart, I mean condoms that a baby would wear.
My adjacency to failure was roughly 1 and a half Kiddie Trojans.
I’m not sure what stopped me, be it cosmic or supernatural, but it gave my brain just enough time to ask itself some rather important questions regarding this little tub treasure. Questions like:
“WHO, THE FUCK, WOULD LEAVE A CHEESY BISCUIT IN MY SHOWER?!”
And inquiries such as:
“AND WHY WERE YOU GOING TO EAT IT, MORON?!”
Seriously, was I so hungry that I would wantonly disobey all the integral conditioning and survival imprinting my parents bestowed upon me like the ever important, “Um, don’t eat that biscuit retard, you don’t know where it’s been or whose it is and also you found it in the shower.” in order to satisfy something so benign as a munchie?
That, I’m sorry to say, was pretty much my reality.
An early morning introspective psychological evaluation of a sad, hungry, naked man who almost ate a bar of soap.
OMG ITS BACK
This shit needs to be published.
This is going in the monologue section and I’m not even sorry.
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